I might be depressed. There, I said it. I've been avoiding this label since as far back as I can remember, but I know it's inevitable I'll finally have to admit it. And I want to change. So I need your help. It's not a severe case, but it sure as hell isn't necessary. Actually, the truth is I am absolutely terrified of allowing myself to be depressed. I went through the absolute worst month of my life, and especially the worst day of my life in which I truly didn't understand HOW I wou...

You know how you know those people that you kind of secretly despise because they are just all-around good at everything? It just doesn't make sense how they can know how to do just about everything and always come out at the top and yet still seem like good people? I'm not going to say that that used to be me, but at least my friends used to think so. I remember in High School, I used to have friends tell me all the time that they kind of hated me because I was "perfect." I know they d...

You know how you talk to some people and just can't help but crack up at everything that comes out of their mouth, whereas other people will repeat exactly what the first person said, and you can barely crack a smile? Obviously this has a lot to do with the art of story-telling. This is why some people are born to be comedians and other people...not so much. This is also true of something serious. When some people tell a story, everyone at the table is all-ears, but this is not true for e...

So I'll admit that I'm known for not getting a particularly satisfactory haircut each time I go in, although most of the time it's just that I end up getting it cut too short. Since I'm in a new place, I thought I'd try a new salon as well. I've never found that one stylist that does my hair just right, so I had nothing to lose. I went in and explained exactly what I wanted to the lady. I said, cut off an inch and a half, give me some smooth looking layers (not choppy!), and a face fram...

I just realized that one of the hardest things in life is to learn to let go. I'm sure this is not some type of epiphany but it kind of is to me because I realize it is the stem of almost allll my problems. I have definitely NEVER mastered this phenomenon and have never come close to being able to figure out how to even begin. It seems so much easier to just push things into the back of your mind or ignore them until something changes and you can just kinda move on because your attention ...

So the first few months at this new place were going well. I was pretty cheery, I had a lot of friends, I was starting to feel attractive, school was going well...for the most part things here were pretty settled. I thought to myself that finally, things were going to be good. And then it suddenly started to hit again. I don't know what it is. I am starting to feel sad again randomly. It's almost like a Catch 22. I get sad, not sure if it's for a reason or if I just start to get sad (b...

Time and time again I've found that the thing that hurts me the most is that I feel like I have a one-way relationship with most people. I listen to them, help them, care for them. In return, I get a lot of "laters." I am fairly closed to begin with. I have a hard time telling people problems or telling them personal things about myself. The times I have tried, I have been unsuccessful in that I have received a whole lot of "I don't know what to say" or "Awee...I'm sorry" or "Don't worry...

There are some things I have recently discovered I am randomly and unhealthily addicted to: - Grey's Anatomy - Lifehouse music - thinking about making fries in the oven and then not doing it - staying up wayyy too late - trying to neutralize my karma by not making mean comments about people...even fake people like celebs (and by neutralize I mean following all comments with, I bet he/she is a very nice person) - greeting people with awkward, "ghetto lingo" - wondering if the more "fa...

I'd like to start off by saying that I love my roommate, I do, and I hate the fact that I complain about her, but it just upsets me that she just acts so weird...and sometimes I wonder if she knows what the word, "friend" means. My latest discovery is that I absolutely can't go to the bar, or probably even out to lunch or perhaps even public, with just my roommate alone. We went out the other night, and first of all, it was hard enough to ask her to look at me when I was trying to talk to...

I went out during the after Thanksgiving Day Sale and bought a shower radio (mostly because everything else I wanted was already gone by the time I got there). I absolutely love music and love to sing in the shower so I have been meaning to buy a shower radio for quite some time. I was really excited about using it and my roommate thought I was crazy because I couldn't wait to take a shower to try out my new radio! Tried it once. Tried it twice. Tried it once more. Now, I don't know i...

I'm a faithful watcher of the show, Grey's Anatomy. Great show, not quite accurate, but great show. So I started to wonder... Am I cut out to be a doctor if I really, really feel for people. I mean, I know I would make a good doctor. A great doctor. A different type of doctor. One who actually listens to her patients and lets them talk and listens to them and actually heals not only their body but also them to some extent. The kind of doctor that we are lacking. I think one of ...

I had written an article before about how some bananas "exploded" all over our kitchen and my lovely roommate left them for me to come back from my weekend at home and clean up. Well, after that, I just decided that I didn't want to go through this trouble anymore, and I would just clean the house on my own instead of asking for her help. It sucks, but it's better than dealing with crap from her. Anyways, so she doesn't have to clean anymore, and I already clean up after her every now an...

Background: So I'm taking this class about creativity and consciousness that basically integrates consciousness with music. Today we had a lady come in to play the harp and it was amazing. I think I have heard the harp before in movies and CD's, but it's a totally different experience in person. It's soft sounds were so soothing and somewhat mystical and they made me feel as though I was in a different place altogether. I felt like I was in the rainforest and was listening to steady d...

Ok, for real. What the hell. I just spent two hours helping someone do data entry just to help the guy out when I for sure did not need to, especially considering I hadn't eaten all day (I helped him until 8 p.m. without any food all day). On the way home I felt kinda good about it, thinking, hey I just did something really nice for someone. Maybe it'll help me out somehow. WRONG!! I walk into the door only to find a rejection from a medical school. Honestly, I really can't take th...