Just trying to get the most out of life by figuring it out
Seriously, this can't be TOO much to ask for!
Published on December 4, 2005 By So Many Questions In Blogging
I had written an article before about how some bananas "exploded" all over our kitchen and my lovely roommate left them for me to come back from my weekend at home and clean up. Well, after that, I just decided that I didn't want to go through this trouble anymore, and I would just clean the house on my own instead of asking for her help. It sucks, but it's better than dealing with crap from her.

Anyways, so she doesn't have to clean anymore, and I already clean up after her every now and then, so that's good for her too. Now, we have two bills that we pay. Cable television and energy. (we split the cost) I send out the energy bill. The only thing she has to do is send out the comcast bill when she gets it. The ONLY thing. Once a month. Takes barely 5 minutes, I would say. Would you agree? Turns out that the comcast bill hasn't been paid in 2 months, and we may have our cable taken away for "delinquent status." Seriously, is this too much to ask? She's a 21 year old girl who is applying for med school (gee, what a surprise that she has the time to manage taking care of her own shit). When I talked to her about it, I stayed so calm. No getting mad, no acting like I'm irritated (I know she doesn't deal well with confrontation). And I had told her a million times before that she should just send out the bill ASAP cuz it only takes a few seconds.

Also, I realized the other day that our relationship is so one-sided. Like if I want to talk about something, she just kinda sits there or she'll start talking about her own "experiences," but I'm all ears if she needs to talk about what's happened with her.

She has a really good heart, and I know she's a nice, naive person, but isn't there a point at which you have to mature?
Seriously....what the hell!

on Dec 04, 2005
Boot her. You shouldn't have to deal with that crap.
on Dec 04, 2005
I have a shitload of bills and it takes me about 5 minutes to pay them all.

I think you have two choices:

a) Get a new roommate.

Continue to be her "mommy"...clean up after her and make sure all the bills get paid.

She's not going to take care of the cable bill, so you're either going to have to take over responsibility for making sure it's paid on time or give her the boot. Is she good about paying for her half of the rent and bills?

Instead of having a "friendship" relationship, you're going to have to have a more business-type relationship with her if you want to keep her as a roommate (although it sounds like you DON'T, and I'm not sure why you're keeping her around). The more you act like her buddy, the more she's going to expect from you. The shit she's pulling with you wouldn't fly if she were living with a relative stranger.

I went from living at home as a teen to living with my husband as an adult, so I skipped the whole roommate thing. I'm glad, too. Sounds like it sucks.
on Dec 04, 2005
Haha. Thing that sucks is that I can't boot her. We're both on the lease, not my decision anymore. And I can't say anything to her cuz I don't want to cause awkwardness between us cuz then I will still be the one that has to pay by living with her.

Silver lining - It could be so much worse, and I know that, but I just feel kinda stuck as is.

I just wish there was a serum to inject people with "common sense" or maturity.

Any other suggestions?
on Dec 04, 2005
i have a difficult time with bills (or anything else requiring mailing). first ya gotta find a stamp. then you gotta remember to take the envelope with you. then you gotta find a mailbox. you can see where this is going, right?

presumably you're hooked to the net thru comcast. arrange for her to pay the bill online.

it may not be the best substitute for maturity serum (in terms of making a point with a roommate who isn't maintaining his or her end of things) but i highly recommend banging two easily replaceable pans together with great vigor, at close enuff range and for sufficient time to get the person's attention.
on Dec 04, 2005
i say, just keep doing what you're doing and keep trying to get her to help.

i have a question for you now... does she have a steady income that she spends some of for you or does she spend it however she wants while you're stuck giving away your money for her? if she doesn't do things for you then I'd be looking for somewhere else to go...

Capt. over and out!
on Dec 04, 2005
Sounds to me like your roommate needs a good swift kick in the arse!
on Dec 04, 2005
Well, she doesn't actually work. We're in college and school is like the only thing that has any significance in her life. But her parents, I presume, are pretty well off, and they pretty much hand her over all the money she needs. She can be good every now and then though about bringing home some ice cream or something for us to share. Like I said, I know it can be so much worse, but sometimes, I just want to give her a nice long, lecture about why she really needs to be responsible, that's all.
on Dec 05, 2005
they pretty much hand her over all the money she needs

Here is the source of your problem. Sounds like this is the life she is at home with. No responsibility. I had a roomate like that.

She had an isuue with leaving dirty dishes all over the house with food stuck to them. She would leave them until I did them. I got tired of it with in a short period of time so I got all of her dishes together one day and turned them over in her bedand left the mess. She moved out a week later.

Crappy roomates aren't worth the trouble. Make her so uncomfortable she is squirming to get out but make sure you have someone in the wings to fill the space.